It Wasn't My Only Incentive

Losing weight wasn't my only reason for starting a Paleo lifestyle.

 I have not written about this before, nor have I discussed this experience with anyone other than my close family and friends. 

 I have made the decision to write about this journey because I truly hope to inspire others and I pray that my open dialogue will give other women the courage to openly talk about their struggles.

 In 2010 I was scheduled for a routine breast screening test, based on my age and family history of breast cancer. My father died at the age of 51 and was BRACA1 positive

 I procrastinated for months, I am not sure why but I missed several appointments for my mammogram and ultrasound. I mean I am not sure what the hesitation was all about. But one day, I just woke up and decided to have the tests. It was just like any other day, heading down to the hospital for a boring mammogram that was taking valuable time away from my 10000 other responsibilities. Just get it over with I kept telling myself. 

 After the mammogram, I proceeded to the ultrasound department. It turns out that my GP had ordered both a mammogram and an ultrasound.

 The breast ultrasound was long and uncomfortable. After about an hour on the table, the technician asked me to wait a moment while she went to find the radiologist. It was now 5pm on a Friday evening. I overheard my technician telling a co-worker that although her shift had ended and she was heading to her cottage for the weekend, she was not leaving until she showed the radiologist my scan. Okay, so now I'm starting to freak out! This was a routine exam, one that I would just have to endure every year for the rest of my life. There wasn't supposed to be any hiccups!

 It's 5:30 now, the radiologist comes to my bedside and takes the ultrasound device into her hands, she says nothing. Except...she can't find the area of concern that appeared on my images from when the technician was scanning. She tries for another 10 minutes without success. Finally she asks the technician to come back and try to replicate the image. It only took the technician about 1 minute to find the "area of concern". The radiologist took over. She took about 100 pictures, or so it seemed. So by this time I am in complete panic mode. Finally they started talking to me. There was an unusual looking area in my left breast. Not a cyst or a tumour just a strange area, whatever the hell that means! The radiologist says, I need to book you in for a biopsy and I need to be the one to perform the biopsy, can you come tomorrow? Seriously? A biopsy! 

 After hearing the details about the procedure, home I went. Of course I am on google and wiki faster than you can say boo! After 1 hour I had already looked at 100 images of breast ultrasounds, trying to see if I could recognize what I saw on the screen during my exam. The image was burned in my head. Thankfully my husband kicked me off the computer and did nothing but provide encouraging and positive thoughts. He convinced me that they were being extra extra cautious because of my family history.

 I was 36 years old, there was no way that a biopsy would detect a malignancy. 2 weeks I had to wait....can you believe it! 

 After one day, I marched into my GP's office demanding Ativan. 

 Finally the call, from my family doctor. He has the results....but.....he doesn't really know what to make of them. Yep that's right you heard me. He is not sure what they mean! 

 The results showed no malignancy, but Atypical hyperplasia, HPV etc etc. Okay so this is good! No cancer! But why are my cells abnormal and multiplying at a very fast rate? And what is HPV doing in my boobs? 

 I am now referred to the CIBC breast centre to see Dr. George at St. Michaels hospital. They have agreed to register me for the high risk screening program.  

A couple of months later, I visit Dr. George and have a breast MRI. They said it is very important to have a very clear baseline so that they could easily monitor me and tell if there are any cellular changes. That makes perfect sense, only one problem, he doesn't like what he sees in the MRI. Off I go for another ultrasound. 2 weeks later I get the results. It seems that I have abnormal cells with hyperplasia. Meaning, they could become malignant. 

 Dr. George tells me that I must come to St. Michaels every 3 months for an MRI and ultrasound. He is very reassuring, he has an amazingly calming personality and remarkably respectful towards women's breast issues. I immediately trust him when he tells me "we are not going to let anything happen to you, as long as you are coming every 3 months, you will be under the best care. We will catch anything before it starts." So for another year I go every 3-4 months, everything is the same. 

Except, Dr. George now mentions that I would have the option to undergo a prophylactic bilateral mastectomy with immediate reconstruction if I felt it was too much coming downtown Toronto 3 times a year for the rest of my life! 

 This option sounded really good. I would not have to take time off work, I would not have to endure the anxiety every 3 months waiting for test results, and wait.....here comes the good part....I will get some nice new perky boobs! 

However...... As usual I procrastinate, I was not 100% sure this was the right decision, and it was a big decision. I would need time off work to recover and I had just started a new job. My dream job actually. 

So I continue to go every few months for screening. 

Then one day, I get a call. Dr. George would like to see me this time. Great what now? 

He is concerned because there has been obvious cellular changes surrounding my biopsy site and an area of concern now in my right breast. He brings the plastic surgeon into the office to give me his opinion regarding a mastectomy with immediate reconstruction. The plastic surgeon was very encouraging but also very blunt. He said "if you want to be truly happy with the results, you must lose weight and build muscle in the arms, chest and back." He said, "I can do the surgery now, but since there is no malignancy at this time, you have time to prepare, most women don't have that opportunity." 

 I left the office that day on a mission. I had 6 months to prepare for the biggest decision of my life.

Previvor